I don't really think younger me really new anything about autism but i had a very stereotypical view on it. Little did I know I am now trying to get diagnosed for it! Whenever I look at me when I was in school (I am know homeschooled) I did do a lot of odd things like:
Beacuse of these things I did the teachers of my school had a private talk with my mum and were a bit concerned about my behaiviour. Around 2020 I was starting to realise I had symptoms related to autism so I asked my mum about it ans she agreed too. I soon decided to go the the doctors about it and they said for me to be diagnosed it was going to be a 3 YEAR WAIT.I was very upset about and it started spiraling thoughts in my head
Even through I wanted to get diagnosed soo BAD i was scared of the thought of being misunderstood and bullied.I knew that i didn't go to school and it was probably or the best beacause a lot of bullying could of happened but it was still very scary to think about. I feel like people with autism are always being picked on because they think that they infantilize them but it's not true and i wish that i could be able to speak up my voice more but I just couldn't. It terrified me so much all the time and I just prayed that i could stay away from the people who could potentially hurt me. Buy i also feel alone since i don't go to school, its like my mind is spiraling about going to school or being homescooled and it stresses me out so much for no reason :[
Even while im writing this i don't think i speaking out everything about how i feel. it's so hard to put my thought into words and i end up being confused about how i feel that i cant even speak about it to my close ones and it can be hard